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Mental pain is less dramatic than physical pain, but it is more common and also harder to bear. The frequent attempt to conceal mental pain increases the burden: it is easier to say: “My head is aching” than to say “My heart is broken”.
A person who tries to kill themselves doesn’t do so out of ‘hopelessness’ and surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom it is in invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill themselves the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning building.
Make no mistake about people who leap from a burning window. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant, the variable is the fire’s flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes slightly less terrible of the two terrors.
It’s not desiring the fall; it’s a terror of the flames. And yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling ‘Don’t!’ and ‘Hang on!’ can understand the jump. You would have to have personally trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling.
There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds.
There’s no point treating a depressed person as though they were just feeling sad, saying ‘There now, you’ll get over it.’ Sadness is more or less like a head cold, with patience, it passes. Depression is like cancer. It’s being colour blind and constantly told how colourful the world is.
You can be surrounded by all these people, but be lonelier than when you are by yourself. Every thought is a battle, you don’t control your thoughts, they control you.
Depression sometimes exists without you knowing it, you might even deny it. It is not an illusion. You don’t even know you are in it until after some time.
The worst kind of crying isn’t the kind everyone can see- the wailing on the street corners, the tearing at clothes, breaking of assets. No, the worst kind happens when your soul weeps and no matter what you do, there’s no way to comfort it. A section withers and becomes a scar on the part of your soul that survives. For people like me, our souls contained more scar tissue than life
It’s hard to be a friend to someone who’s depressed, but it is one of the kindest, noblest, and best things you’ll ever do. Be there for them when they come through the other side, try to understand the hopelessness, the loneliness and lethargy they’re going through. It’s quite insidious, it compounds daily. Try not to judge how someone is dealing with pain you have never experienced instead, love them, help them.
One of the worst kind of pain is when you’re smiling just to stop the tears from falling.
No matter how bad things are right now, even if you feel stuck. Despite how many days you’ve spent crying, stressing and wishing things were different. No matter how hopeless and depressed you feel. I promise you that it won’t feel this way forever, keep going. Be patient. You will feel better than this, maybe not yet, but you will, you just keep living until you are alive again. GRATITUDE IS A MUST.